This is mainly an update on how life has been going for me! I will put in a different color font my dental portions for those of you who are only interested in such. I'm also tired, so excuse my worse than normal writing skills. :)
When I last visited the Dentist, I did not get my braces off like expected. Instead I got another ligature, and my rubber band class moved up. I was told by my next appointment, if my teeth shifted enough, I would then have my braces taken off. I also have to get a cavity in my upper right molar filled. My mouth truly rejects my teeth! Hopefully, I am on the path to having a nearly perfect smile.
It is officially 2019, and I am hoping there are mostly good things in store for me this year! On the first, I was told I'd be getting a raise; and on the fifth, I found out I couldn't keep a job... Since I don't drive yet (I know, an 18 year old who doesn't drive! Alert the media...) and my family car (aside from my fathers vehicle) was the only source of transportation I had.. Notice I said was.. Well, I couldn't keep my job.
My father going to work and having to also come home and drive me or pick me up, became too much of an obstacle. Also, since we live off of paycheck to paycheck, financially everything has gone downhill. This has also affected me and my family emotionally since we now rarely leave the house or do anything. I hate to be so depressing, but overall, things haven't been going great, and I just don't lie. Especially when it comes to this. Sometimes I feel like the only thing that I have that's real anymore is this journey and what I've written. Having a job has made me realize many things.
For example, I always knew that some people are rude, but I guess I never knew just how many. I have been cussed out, put down, harassed and so on. The amount of anxiety I had going into this job verses my attitude leaving, is drastically different. I don't care so much anymore about being judged by others, which is a positive takeaway. I have had a lot of time to think now, and have made up my mind on a few things that will be within my reach soon. I decided that I'm going to risk it all for a music career. I've been wanting to be a singer since I was four and have never shaken it.
About 6 years ago, I started posting on Smule and SoundCloud by just holding my phone up to my mouth, and believe me; it is just as awful as it sounds! Somehow, I managed to get a ton of views on certain tracks which has made me feel a bit more motivated, but once again, there's a setback. I don't have a suitable computer to record and/or produce music on anymore. So, in addition to having to save for a car; SOMEHOW get my license AND go to college, I also need a computer FOR COLLEGE and to be able to do my music stuff seriously again. Ugh. Can't I just win the lottery?
I only need to win about $5,000. I can buy a new fridge for my family so we can stop putting our milk in the freezer. I can buy 2 cheap cars (one for my family and one for me personally) and I could get a computer and any left over money my parents could put towards the bills that are piling up.
I know this post was probably not what you were expecting, but I just felt like over sharing tonight.
I hope all of you are doing okay, and I hope everyone had Happy Holidays. If you feel like sharing some positive vibes, feel free to comment any good things in your life. Whether they are past, present or future. You can comment whatever you're thinking or feeling, really! :D Anyways, have a good night, and I'll post again soon. My next appointment is January 25th.
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